Saturday, October 31, 2009

Why Didn't He Call?, cont'd.

'Our date was going so well until I turned that lamp on...'

Vinyl Wall Decal:

From the Dept. of Un-Fun Toys

A medley of root vegetables, handmade with love.

Thanks, vegan relative!

Bunch of Radishes:

Sack of Fleece Potatoes:

Rudy the Turnip: StumbleUpon

Baby name as destiny, cont'd.

Regular Kraftomatic readers know I'm a bit obsessed with unfortunate baby names. Here's a little gal who's sure to grow up to rhyme with witch. 

Do NOT forget to change Carma's diaper.

Monogrammed Bloomers Diaper Cover: StumbleUpon

Friday, October 30, 2009

Have a cozy Halloween

Evil Skull Can Cozy: StumbleUpon

The Paradox of Choice, cont'd.

Whenever you see the phrase Toilet-Paper Cover or Hat, you know something interesting is happening.

Says the seller:

"As a toilet roll cover it holds 2 rolls stacked 1 on top of another.

As a hat it fits head size 22" - 23".

The choice is yours how you use it."

Hand Knitted Toilet Roll Cover or Hat: StumbleUpon

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Trick or Treat, Guinea Pig Style

I'm not liking this one bit.

About the reindeer costume, the seller advises:  "The costume looks a bit small, but this is only because this particular cavy is pregnant, the belly strap actually goes just behind her front legs."

I think I've heard enough.

Guinea Pig Costumes -- Princess, Reindeer, Camouflage (?): StumbleUpon

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

From the Dept. of Things I Wish I Hadn't Seen

No, he's not a cautionary teaching tool for prenatal health classes.

He is 14 inches of disproportionately crocheted acrylic yarn you'll want to adopt and shower with love.

Says the seller:  "Adam's head leans slightly towards his right shoulder and that makes him look more expressive."

Also:  "Hug him!"

I feel sad now.

Also, he's $138. And he should really never take his hair off.

Adam - Crochet Baby Boy:


Handmade finger food

Practice foods for social phobics? 

Don't eat the grapes - they're a garnish.

Felt pretend brie wheel and party platter:

Monday, October 26, 2009

Go with the flow

If you're into handcrafted blood cells, here's something.

Choose oxygenated (bright red) or deoxygenated (dark red).

Is anyone still with me?

Says the seller:  "Great gift for that biologist or hematologist in your life."

Crocheted Oxygenated and Deoxygenated Blood Cells: StumbleUpon

In the news!

The good folks at LA Weekly have blogged about Kraftomatic. Check it out! StumbleUpon

Sunday, October 25, 2009

Craftohydrates: A Dieter's Lament

More lovingly rendered facsimiles of my problem foods. Thanks, crafters.

Crocheted pancakes and pizza

Felt penne and ice cream sandwiches: StumbleUpon

Friday, October 23, 2009


It's hard to imagine ordering the pattern for this crochet project and then taking the time to create it, knowing it's going to come out as a unicorn lip-balm cozy. No disrespect.

Unicorn lip balm cozy pattern: StumbleUpon

Damn the Torpedo

I feel a little off kilter now.

Fall Sweater in Sagebrush:

Questionable Soaps, cont'd.

Feeling clean yet?

Dog Chew Top Soap for People:

Thursday, October 22, 2009

Sad Figurines: Vinnie's Story

As regular Krafto readers know, I'm a sucker for a sad figurine. And a sad model. And really anyone who looks sadder than I am. It's not flattering but it's true. Speaking of unflattering, I think this isn't Vinnie's best angle.

As a side note, I have no idea what Fox's Biscuits are. I could google them. But the look on Vinnie's face says 'why bother.'


Meet the Nose Cozy

Friends, this is big. In my humble yet obsessive opinion, this is the best thing to happen to the cozy since the advent of the asthma-inhaler sweater.

Says the seller: "Tired of a cold nose? Me too! So I crocheted a Nose Warmer."

I particularly like the camo-patterned one. So subtle you hardly see it.

Nose Warmer: StumbleUpon

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Crafting's tiniest victims

Nobody suffers more from Obsessive Crafting Disorder than nearby newborns. Here's a nice example of what I like to call a Neck Trainer.

Oversized Pink Rose Clip with Pink Crocheted Beanie Hat:

The Name Game, cont'd.

Regular readers know that I can't seem to get enough of unusual baby names. Here's a nice name for a Jersey girl. Or maybe not.

Two spellings, one fine city.

Personalized Name Tatouage (?):

Custom Baby Bloomers:

Oh Canada, cont'd.

I'm a bit confused by this "mixed-media assemblage" made of soapstone, sparkled pom-poms and fun fur.

Says the seller: "It makes an excellent mental refuge."

After forking over $295 I might need a bit of mental refuge.

Am I dancing around the question of what this is? You betcha.

Sno Globe: StumbleUpon

The balm

Who knew a lip-balm cozy could make you feel so jaunty and carefree?

Mercerized Cotton Lip Balm Cozy: StumbleUpon

Monday, October 19, 2009

The Cozy Co-Worker

A cozy for every office supply, and every office supply in its cozy.

The binder-clip cover is really something, no?

Office Diva Cozy Set: StumbleUpon

Walter the Gin Poodle: A Cautionary Tale

This cozy is specially designed to help you hide your alcohol habit beneath a smokescreen of bad taste.

I sincerely hope you won't ever need his services, but if you do, go with the dark one. It'll hold up better.

Notes the seller: This will fit over your favorite bottle of "fun-water," including wine. Isn't that special?

Walter the Gin Poodle Bottle Cozy: StumbleUpon

On the bubble

Social phobics, proceed with caution. Despite its good intentions, this pillow might not help you attract the caliber of friends you're yearning for.

Says the seller: "They're durable and fully washable, and have a handle on the back for easy posing when the occasion arises."

Say It Cushion: StumbleUpon

Sunday, October 18, 2009


Sure, it's getting cold out there. But has it come to this?

Cream Foks: StumbleUpon

Friday, October 16, 2009

The mercury's dropping...

and your brewskis are feeling the chill.

Crocheted beer cozies: StumbleUpon

Needlefelted Nuthatches R Us

You know what? I love these little woolen creatures. And not only because I've been called a nuthatch a time or two. But that might be a factor. On the margins.

Rock Wren, Mr. Ruby Throated Hummingbird, This Little Piggy, and Mr. White Breasted Nuthatch: StumbleUpon

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Crocheted munchies

For when you're finished with that cozied bong.

Wait, what?

Read on.

Crocheted Chocolate Chip Cookies: StumbleUpon

Bong cozy?

It's all good.

Custom Water Pipe Cozy: StumbleUpon

Friday, October 9, 2009

Meet Little Zimby

Not another Philip Zimbardo likeness rendered in yarn.

Because whenever I think of the Stanford Prison Study, I think of crochet.

Crocheted Philip Zimbardo StumbleUpon