When memes collide

I know, spring is finally here. But apparently your soap still needs a scarf. Just FYI.

Peppermint Owl Soap with Crocheted Scarf:

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=23847749

Curb your dog's cravings...

If I told you these most unfortunate dog treats were made with human-grade ingredients, would you be less horrified? I didn't think so. Neither am I.

I'm sorry. Let's forget this ever happened.

DoodyPops Dog Treats biscuits hypo allergenic , wheat free , hormone, antibiotic free, artisan made Poo:

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=23170746

Why They Hate Us

No, not the terrorists. The babies.

Parents, please. This Memorial Day, Flag Day, Fourth of July, Labor Day, Veterans' Day, Iwo Jima Day (I'm making that up), etc....please think twice before turning your tyke into a walking flag pole. I'm no expert, but it just doesn't seem like a good idea.




Stars and Stripes Boutique Double Bow:
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=pounce&listing_id=23659945

Buzz kill

I'm as delighted as the next rational being that Barack Obama made it to the White House (seriously...Sarah Palin, we hardly knew ya). But these glow-in-the-dark 3-D Obama refrigerator magnets are not doing it for me somehow. And the Bill Clinton magnet isn't any better.

A note to the well-intentioned crafter: Maybe glow-in-the dark plastic isn't your medium? I say this with love.









President Barack Obama Glow-in-the-Dark 3D Fridge Magnet:
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=19687107

The saddest dog in the world

He'll whine about this in therapy someday.

Red Striped Dog Tie (Small):
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=14358117

Headscratcher

I'm confused. Not only is this...unusual...piece...being discounted just when I thought the economy was starting to look up, but it turns out this is not a paw but a partial skull.

Also, even with the discount it still costs more than a teethcleaning.

Clearly I have a lot to learn. Or should I say, bone up on? (Sorry.)

Black Forest Relic Partial Skull with Row of Teeth:

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=22447081

New Hampshire humor?

I guess this joke wouldn't work for New Jersey. Too toxic. I kid!


Catnip State of Vermont:
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=19218176

Ferret cozy

The pirate theme is topical, but the coziness is timeless.

Just don't mistake this for a fleece cap, or you'll have a ferret and his most recent droppings on your head.

Red Pirate Ferret Cozy:
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=21921049

Smartphone/wampum mashup

The item name says it all (and then some):

Leather Fringe Pouch Hippie Bag Cell Phone Holder Small Hippy Suede Purse Native American inspired Medicine Pouch Necklace ID Card Iphone Blackberry Business Camera

Keep your phone on vibrate for a special peyote-inspired effect that's sure to impress your business associates.

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_1&listing_id=18886381

Yikes

I know a few catphobes who would NOT like this picture. And I think I know a few cats who would not like this garment.









Sphinx Cat Sweater:
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=22411769

Is it wrong...

...that sad models make me smile?

I guess the Queen of the Mistral has bad days too.








Queen of the Mistral:
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=8365332

Of Coffee Cozies and Frappe Skirts

Apparently, some trends are seasonless.



Coffee corset:
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=21627296

Fuzzy frappe skirt:
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=10820468

Costume drama

If, like me, you feel a little sad when you hear the words Renaissance fair, these collars won't be for you. But they're for someone out there, and that fact, paradoxically, makes me a little happy. Go figure. I know, I've got to start trying to care a little less.


http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=21255307

Notebook cozy? Why not.

The cozymania continues...

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=23521494

Spring knits

Yes, it's time to rotate your apples' knitwear toward those pastel cottons.

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=22817318

Questionable taste

Oh my.

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=22698253

Wash your mouth out with...

http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=5623345

Soap, no radio

So cool you won't want to wash your hands.

http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=6867426

Not for PETA members

I don't make 'em, I just post 'em.

Apologies to Ingrid Newkirk.

Biology 101 Knitting Pattern:
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_1&listing_id=23276715

Jesus take the ball

For those of you who pray to an even more arbitrary and senseless deity.

http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=5579301

Balletomanes take note.

Duly noted.

If you're not a balletomane (I love using that word), fear not. There are versions of this shirt for you (high tops, bikini, cowboy hat...whatever your privates might possibly hypothetically wear).

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=23165394

Shower the geeks that you love with love

Because geekiness doesn't have to stop at the water's edge.






Playstation soap controllers:
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=23080913

Thanks Mom, cont'd.

There's gonna be some actual food at this birthday party, right?


The Chenille Chef:
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=20415336

The coziest pills on the block

Come to think of it, where are the condom cozies? Crafters? Anyone?










Deer Birth Control Case:
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=22738017

After you've festooned everything else...

Which would be less terrifying for your unsuspecting guests? A giant crimson pufferfish or a Charlie Sheen lookalike in a cowboy hat?

Personally, I think this would be more of a gotcha if the decals were on the inside of the lid, so they'd give you a bit of a start as you're about to...start. Well, that's how I'll festoon MY toilet. Consider yourself forewarned.









Pufferfish decal:
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=20581396

Honky decal:
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_2&listing_id=20581396